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Stromtrooper - Ten Commandments

4429 Views 56 Replies 23 Participants Last post by  superslomo
I'm starting to think of the stromtrooper 10 commandments
1. Safety
For any given situation, safety and survivability are the prime directives.
A stromtrooper aims to have many adventures for as long as he lives.

2. FOF - Function Over Form.
If two or more safe solutions are available for a given problem (passed law #1), choose the more functional solution.

3. Cheap
If two or more safe functional solutions (passed laws #1 & #2) are available for a given problem, choose the cheaper solution.

4. DIY
If two or more cheap safe functional solutions (passed laws #1, #2 & #3) are available for a given problem, choose the one that can be done on your own without buying off-the-shelf or paying for external services.

5. Spread knowledge, Be open to learn new things
A stromtrooper shall spread his knowledge and experience in order to help fellow stromtroopers and other people in general.
A stromtrooper should be open to learn and accept new ideas and concepts from other more experienced.

6. Don't do to others what you wouldn't want them to do to you
A stromtrooper respects the environment around him and acts as a responsible social being - riders, cagers, other people and the universe in general.
(e.g. installing very loud mufflers, or playing very loud music on speakers is not acceptable as it interrupts others' life)

7. Do not over farkle
Over functionality (adding features which are not really needed) are contradicting the FOF principle as they actually reduce functionality (add weight/complexity) and reduce reliability.

8. Do not discriminate
All stromtroopers are born equal regardless of:
1. V-Strom type (Vee vs. Wee vs. Glee)
2. Gender and sexual preference
3. Nationality
4. Age
5. Number of posts in forum

9. Do not look at other bikes
Even though polygamy is allowed with bikes, be loyal to your v-strom.
In return your v-strom will be loyal to you, and make you happy.

10. Do not forget Murphy
He is out there, waiting...If something can go wrong it will..
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· Living the Stereotype
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EDIT - Please help finish this. I want to print it and put it in my Garage and under the bike seat.
I suggest you wander the desert for 20 years and come back to finish the rest yourself.
 

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A StromTrooper should always attempt to smile and appear genuinely concerned when a confused cruiser rider asks: "What IS that? and "Why would you want to ride one?" A StromTrooper shall remain humble in the knowledge of his or her vast superiority.
 

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Discussion Starter · #5 · (Edited)
I suggest you wander the desert for 20 years and come back to finish the rest yourself.
The magic number in the bible is 40,not 20.

Moses was on the mountain for 40 days.
Wandering in the desert was done for 40 years.
Noah waited for the water to recede for 40 days.
... there are other examples, you get the idea...
 

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Discussion Starter · #6 ·
A StromTrooper should always attempt to smile and appear genuinely concerned when a confused cruiser rider asks: "What IS that? and "Why would you want to ride one?" A StromTrooper shall remain humble in the knowledge of his or her vast superiority.
Your first part falls under "Live and let live"
The other part - see Rule #6
 

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Discussion Starter · #7 ·
shouldn't there be a bunch of thees and thous?
Yes, in the bible there were 5 Do's and 5 Dont's.

But hey, I'm no Moses and aint got 40 days to complete it just to find out that you worship some gold idol (It would be a HD HOG??) and then I have to break it and re-start from scratch!!
 

· Evolving Curmudgeon
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The magic number in the bible is 40,not 20.

Moses was on the mountain for 40 days.
Wandering in the desert was done for 40 years.
Noah waited for the water to recede for 40 days.
... there are other examples, you get the idea...
Ease up on the religion dude.
 

· Living the Stereotype
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The magic number in the bible is 40,not 20.

Moses was on the mountain for 40 days.
Wandering in the desert was done for 40 years.
Noah waited for the water to recede for 40 days.
... there are other examples, you get the idea...
Religious scholars seldom excell at mathematics and the sciences.

In the Old Testament, Moses needed 40 years of wandering the desert to come back with 10 commandments.

So, on average, each commandment required four years of desert-wandering.
Now you've already got the first five commandmants, so you only need 20 years of desert-wandering to come up with the other five commandments.

Now, I know he came down the mountain with the two tablets and all ten commandments at one time, but who can fit forty years of desert-wandering into their busy schedules these days?
 

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Discussion Starter · #11 ·
Religious scholars seldom excell at mathematics and the sciences.

In the Old Testament, Moses needed 40 years of wandering the desert to come back with 10 commandments.

So, on average, each commandment required four years of desert-wandering.
Now you've already got the first five commandmants, so you only need 20 years of desert-wandering to come up with the other five commandments.
OK, now I understand your figures :)
Just FYI - I'm not a religious scholar (actually I'm secular), and I actually excell in Math and in particular computer science :)
But with your explicit explanation I get the idea.

Now, back to our original discussion - Could you please think of another law?
 

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time wasted on this thread is time lost on riding :biggrinjester::biggrinjester: But i must say the first post did bring a smile!
 

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sorry, I'm not a DIY person, not that I can't, that I don't want too


nor am I a safety nazi


#5 live and let live is about the only "commandment" you'll see me abide by

and by the way, "commandments" are kinda contrary to that statement, eh !



 

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Actually, as we all know, moses came back with 15 commandments.
ah yes, one of my all time favorite comedy movies

Roman Officer: Do you know the penalty for a slave who strikes a Roman citizen?
[people in the crowd raise hands enthusiastically]
Roman Officer: Ok, you... you had your hand up first.
Man in crowd: Death by torture!
Roman Officer: No... You?
Man in crowd: Crucifixion!
Roman Officer: Wrong! You?
Man in crowd: They shove a living snake up your ass!
Roman Officer: Ah, no... but that's very creative!
 

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If it were to happen today, Moses would've ditched the stone tablets and used an i-Pad, spreading the word via Facebook (probably not getting that many "likes" due to content).

But on topic, in the brotherhood of Strommers, there would be no fratricide. DL650 owners would not be called "weenies" and DL1000 owners would not be suspected of making up for a certain "inadequacy" (that's not even remotely true :biggrinjester:)

And we would all be using synthetic oil without having to ask if it's OK.
 

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I don't do "commandments"...regardless of the author. I MAY however choose to entertain "suggestions" if presented in the proper spirit.
 

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Discussion Starter · #20 ·
Added rules 7-9.

The last one is missing.

I was on Mount Washington yesterday (with my Dodge Grand Caravan) and there I saw the light :biggrinjester:
I guess great mountains give you this urge to write up commandments :green_lol:

Will return there with my V-Strom!
 
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